Here we are, in the first week of June. The year is almost half way done, and it’s so easy to wonder where has it gone?
But truth be told?
I love this year.
I feel that as a human being, I have grown more this year than I have in any other, and because of this blog, I can almost trace my footsteps.
But I also started this year with some words. Words to guide me and provide me with direction. Words to live by.
As June rolls in, I see just how far I have come.
I have bitten the bullet and faced fear head on. I’ve started working on my book. I’ve stopped hiding in the shadows and faced my dread of public speaking. I’ve realised, it’s not just ok to shine; it’s necessary.
I’ve come to embrace me. To realise that I need to be confident in myself, in all my imperfect, crazy glory. That the best way I can be is me; when I am not who God made me, I sell the world short.
I’m realising that this blogging gig is hard and sometimes I am despondent at lack of growth as quickly as I would like it. But just as I see the value I have in myself, I am learning the value of others. My goal in this little patch of interwebz is to inspire you to be the best you, by me being the best me.
I keep waiting for a moment.
A big one.
Every time I hit publish on a post, I wonder ‘will this be the one that goes viral? Will this be the one that changes the world?’ Because you see, I am not content to just write clever words. I am focused on eternity. I want every thing to count. Not because I want fame for myself; but because I honestly want to see other people live their lives to the brink, content in who they are, and what they have.
So I wait for the moment.
And it never comes.
My Facebook stream is not filled with everyone sharing my posts. I have not crashed the Little Hero Hosts server.
But it’s ok.
Because every time I wonder if this will be the post, I will get one comment, that makes me realise that it’s not about the millions.
If I write something and it goes viral great; but if I write something and only one person reads it and is inspired, or tells me that was what they needed to hear, then that is even greater.
There exists the story, somewhere, it’s hard to find, about a young girl in America, who would drive a friend to youth group every Friday. It was a forty five minute car trip there and back, but she did it faithfully week after week, because she believed in what she was doing.
I can’t find this girls name. I can’t even find her story online.
But I know the name of the girl who she drove to church on a Friday night. She was Cassie Bernall. One of the victims of the Columbine High School Massacre, who had been shot after declaring her belief in God.
The story of Cassie is one of the most widely known in conjunction with that tragedy, and yet her friendly mentor, who had invested in her faith for a significant period of time, is unnamed. She is just as much of a heroic figure, and yet know one knows who she is.
Sometimes, the most valuable thing we will ever do, is to be the person who encourages someone else. Sometime our ‘big moment’ is not us becoming huge in the eyes of everyone, it’s us making ourselves smaller, so we can lift others up.
As the second half of the year crawls in, I can see my journey thus far. From doubt and insecurity, through freedom and faith to the stark realisation that it is not about me.
It’s about you.
I don’t know you, but I believe in you. I believe you have potential, and greatness and something to offer that no one else is offering. And I want to be a part of that. To see you grow, and become better and who you’re meant to be.
I want to make you laugh, at times, but I also want to make you think, and I want to encourage you.
I want to be the person in your back story that no one knows about, that encourages you to stand out from the crowd. Because the world needs more people who can embrace themselves, and be real, and honest and authentic, and makes things better.
The world needs people who realise that it’s not about the many. It’s about the one.
It’s not about the fame; I was wrong when I wrote that. It’s about the joy of serving humanity.
I want to serve humanity.
And that starts with you.