I never wanted to have a boy. I know that might sound truly terrible to some, but it was never something I needed.
I think it came from the fact that I had so many nephews. There is a significant age gap between my sisters and I, and they had children quite young. I was seven when my eldest nephew was born, so I grew up with them. They were more like brothers than anything else.
I understood boys (as much as any female can). They are loud, smelly, hyperactive, busy, careless, lovers of things that creep and crawl, always hungry, and always on the go.
Boys are exhausting!
So when the sonographer told me that my little bundle was gifted with a penis, I didn’t cope so well.
To be perfectly honest, I went home, cried and ate three salami rolls, before falling asleep a fat, bloated, mess.
When I awoke, I was better. I started to see the positive; this didn’t have to be a bad thing.
All week I have been considering what to write for the first thankful Thursday of the year. I thought it should be significant, and I almost didn’t join in today. It wasn’t because I had nothing to be thankful for, but because everything felt forced, and insincere.
And then, last night after dinner, we decided to go for an impromptu walk.
It wasn’t until we were out of the house that I realised Bailey didn’t have a shirt on, (in our weather why would you?) and his shorts were on backwards again. Miraculously, at least, he had his shoes on the right feet.
As I watched him ride his bike completely flat out, and all gung ho, a favourite bible verse sprung to mind: ‘perfectly and wonderfully made.’
In that moment, nothing could have been more fitting. He is perfect.
Now, don’t get me wrong, my girls are beautiful, but there is something infinitely wonderful about my little boy. It’s not just his adorable face; it’s at the core of who he is.
It’s his masculinity.
Yesterday, he asked me to come and look for lizards with him. It’s not a new thing; we have done it before. Conveniently we never find them though, cause then I would be forced to catch them, and that’s really not my thing.
But it is Bailey’s.
As we crept through the grass together, I was determined that this time, not only would we find one, but I would conquer my fear and catch one. I want to be the kind of mother who loves who her children are, and encourages them to be that person. And if that means catching lizards with a three year old, the lizards better watch out.
You see, having an extra y chromosome in the family was never my intention, but it’s what I got. And I am so thankful that I did, because that little boy is the absolute apple of my eye. I can not adequately put into words just how endearing he is. He steals my heart every time. There is not much I wouldn’t do for him, including crawling thought the prickles in a hot day looking for lizards. (If he wants to catch frogs or spiders he is on his own though!)
So my significant Thankful Thursday post is for Bailey. For the son I never thought I wanted, and yet couldn’t imagine living without.
Gee I love him.