It’s half past eight and already it is one of those mornings. All the kids have varying degrees of a cold, and thus have varying degrees of emotional tolerance and compliance. Ava was up half the night (well that is a slight exaggeration, but that’s what it feels like), Bridie is home from school, and Bailey is just being sooky. Taylah is not too bad, but she is always the healthiest of the lot.
Have said that, she may be healthy but we spent the better part of yesterday afternoon and this morning talking about boys.
She is seven.
God help me.
It seems one of the boys in her class has a crush on her, to which her reaction is, and I quote, ‘ewwww!’ But that doesn’t mean he won’t stop smiling at her, or her friends won’t stop talking about it. The poor little thing really does not know what to do.
Did I mention that she is in only seven?
I am really not ready for this yet.
Yesterday’s homework time was spent with me coaching her on what to do if he should ask her out. (Her reaction was ‘No Way!’) I suggested that maybe we could do it a little bit nicer, so as not to break his heart and turn him off women forever. She then decided that ‘no thank you’ might be more appropriate.
(In a complete change of topic, Bridie just came and showed me her writing. It says:
to mmmmmm w lwtsm Bridie, which apparently means, I went to the movies. Very cute.)
Although I am loving Taylah being that bit older and all the fun things we can do with her now, it’s hard not to miss the innocence of a year or two earlier, when she was just learning to read and write, and not worrying about the yucky feelings that comes when a boy looks at her like that. (I kinda want to go and speak to this boy. Remind him that she is only seven!)
We were at play group one week, and Bailey was being slightly difficult; not awful but not easy either. Anyway, I decided it was time to go, and one of the other mums said, ‘go home, put him to bed, and then when he is asleep, go and look at him.’ There is nothing quite like a sleeping baby, or child, to remind you just how much you love them. It’s easy to forget the tantrums, and the arguments, and the difficult conversations when they are so blissfully quiet and perfect.
The other day I went in to wake Bailey to pick up the girls from school, and he just looked so angelic. It reminded me of that Aerosmith (I think?) song from the Armageddon movie.
I could stay awake, just to hear you breathing
Watch you smile while you are sleeping,
While you’re far away and dreaming
I could spend my life in this sweet surrender
I could stay lot in this moment forever
Where every moment spent with you you is a moment I treasure
I don’t want to close my eyes
I don’t want to fall asleep
Cause I miss you baby,
And I don’t want to miss a thing
Now to be perfectly honest, right now, yes, I do want to close my eyes! I do want to fall asleep. I think most mothers at some times would agree wholeheartedly.
But I have also been thinking about Krysty, who recently died, leaving behind two tiny boys, and how her mothers heart would have ached to have just one more day with them. How she would have loved to see them learn to write, or watch them sleep, or talk about girls when they were only seven.
How she would have loved to be having ‘one of those days.’
It makes me realise that I take far too much for granted, and I waste far too much time doing stuff that is really not important. In my home I have four little people who are growing so fast that some days I can almost see the change, and I yet I so easily neglect their eternal significance.
We are entering unchartered territory with Taylah, and there are a lot of things I am not ready for yet. And on the flip side, we are walking through very familiar paths with Bailey and Ava, that it can be easy to nonchalant. And yet every moment, good, bad or otherwise is precious and worthy of my attention. Sometimes I feel guilty for all the things I have forgotten, but then I remember that God remembers and hold all those moments, cause his love is so much more perfect than mine.
So the challenge today is to enjoy every moment, despite the sleeplessness and the runny noses and the boy talk (she is seven!)
And if all else fails, wait till they are in bed and watch them sleep.