It’s no secret that when it comes to self image, I have my issues. Most of us do, and those are the sort of things that don’t fix themselves overnight.
But as much as it is not the clothes that make the man, it’s not the body either. From when we are tiny we are told ‘it’s what’s inside that counts’ and finally, finally, I’m starting to realise this.
I’ve had a bit of a breakthrough the last number of weeks. There was an
epiphany; a moment, that saw me realise that who I am is good, and fun and an awesome person. A person who is talented and precious, and is uniquely me.
As I’ve thought about this, I’ve begun to see that the greatest strength people possess, is when they are confident in themselves, and who they are; when they are comfortable in their own skin.
Growing up in the church, and youth group, there was always a lot of emphasis on what God had called you to do. It was drilled into us that each of us has purpose in life and destiny. We are built for more than just existing.
Obviously though, when you’re young and idealistic, this of course means you’re going to change the world, in some way or another.
The reality is, that most of us will live our lives in relative obscurity, but does that make us any less of a person?
As a parent, when I see my kids excelling at anything, I feel proud. When they are happily persuing an obvious talent, that makes me happy. And I’m pretty sure it’s the same with God. When I’m doing what I love and what I’m good at, I’m living my purpose.
Now I don’t mean to preach, and I don’t think you even have to subscribe to the notion of a deity to find that when you’re just being you, you’re happier than when you’re not. When you’re doing what you love, (so long as what you love is not graffiti-ing peoples fences or stealing their purses), you’re doing what you were meant to do.
And that is an awesome thing.
Blogging brings me so much joy. The ability to indulge my creative writing passion, as well as connect with so many awesome people ticks all the boxes. So imagine my surprise when the sales lady from the weekend, had no idea what it was. In fact, I’m pretty sure h exact words were ‘like Facebook and twitter and stuff?’
Yes like that.
Even more appalling, was my reaction. I was kind of embarrassed. Like going to a conference for blogging wasn’t quite a real thing, or a valid thing at the very least.
And then I remembered what blogging is for me; what it has done for me. It has given me the opportunity, to be me. Jess. Not just mum.
Vlogging has drawn my crazy erratic side out from where it’s been hiding. Since blogging my confidence has been restored, and I’m starting to dream again. To be honest and authentic with myself, and enjoy my own company.
And in writing that, auto correct wanted to change blogging to belonging, which I think fits pretty well. I feel like, for the first time in a long time, that I belong. I have something to offer. I have a purpose.
And there is nothing silly about that.
So I came home and wrote a song about it, as you do.
And then I vlogged it, cause, well it’s Tuesday, and we haven’t had an IBOT vlog for a little while.
I also got some help from some friends who have made an appearance.
Is there something you love, that makes you feel alive?
Has it been a long time since you have felt any kind of purpose or self confidence?
Are you as surprised as me by how deep these questions have got for a Tuesday?